It’s more important than that. EPL starts again today. In 1 hour and 35 minutes. And I am so excited I could burst. Almost a year of unbroken football with the European Championship next summer. In the meantime, though, an ugly man who played his entire career for the most unmentionable team scores a raft of delightful goals:
He is ugly, but a good surname. Was there a time when both he and Le Saux were in the national team? It made me think the French would think we were awfully civilised. Anyway, aren’t Southampton now in the Conference (South) while Portsmouth live it up in the Premiership? Will Pompey be playing in Europe this year?
I slightly loathe the football season. The endless talk of Manchester United. The Ceefax. The passion of heterosexual males which would be far better spent in my direction. Has Shevchenko stayed at Chelsea? If so, at least I’ll have a player to fancy.
Ceefax is long gone – interactive TV and the internet all the way. Lovely as you are, you are never going to inspire hets as much Thierry Henry or Ronaldo or even Wayne Rooney, dear… Shevchenko has stayed, and there are a raft of new Slavic signings – 2 Bulgarians and a Croat at Manchester City under Sven alone.
Sven? He who was the rubbish England manager? I thought the former Prime Minister of Thailand had bought Manchester City? Can’t he manage them as well?
I suppose it’s a good thing that the hets are more interested in Wayne Rooney than me. I’d have no way of keeping millions of men amused.